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23 November 2006 @ 02:19 pm
My mom is an evil women. But b/c of this I'm currently having the best thanksgiving ever.
I slept over at a freinds house, had to sneak out the window and now am at starbucks
sure I miss the turkey. who wouldn't? but i got pumkin spice coffee!
30 August 2006 @ 03:41 am
ever have the feeling that maybe your not the brightest crayon in the box?
i do.
i tend to trade the ways i express my feelings. nothing really makes sense.
01 June 2006 @ 10:34 pm
it's not offical untill it's on facebook.
man i was i was a gaysian right about now
24 May 2006 @ 05:09 am
-List ten things you want to say to people but know you never will.
-Don't say who they are, use people only once.
-All who read this must post in their own journal

1- I'm afraid to let you go and jelous as all hell... and i'm sorry.
2-I joke with you b/c I dunno what else to do, I worry alot, and don't think life treats you fairly. I hate when I think your boy doesn't treat you right, I know you love him, but I never will think he's good enuf for you.
3-I hate that I let you walk all over me, and that no matter what horrible thing you do I'll bail you out, stealing money from work is going to far. You think life owes you so much more then you give. You need help. You've changed, I hate when it shows.
4- Here's your ring back.
5- I hate going against you, i fear what you'll say about my latest choice.
6- I wanted to tell you I never want to see you again, but you are what connects me to my siblings. therefor I have to see you to see them. You are worth nothing to me besides that connection.
7-Grow up, clean up your mess and start making something of yourself, your life is about more then buger king and weed. Give up the drug, go to school, and become a productive citizen, or move out of the apartment. both of you.
8- I don't want to sleep with you, ever. Stop trying. It's annoying, and confusing.
9- when you told me you'd piss on my grave, I hated you. I'll never forgive you for saying that. I hate you a little bit more every time you say it. It's the cruelest thing anyone's ever said to me. It's hard to consider you a friend now.
10- I'm sorry. Let's be freinds?
being away has been good, gotten alot closer to some freinds, was giving the space we needed to figure it all out...pretty sure when i come back that our freindship will end? If there is no reason to seek eachother out, no deadlines on time spent together.I'm certaintly not surprised. We had a good run. All's fair in this game.
04 May 2006 @ 12:10 am
if you were ask me about my first year at college i would tell you how funny it is that i spent 9months here and at first i feared was pregnant. then i'd tell you about how a new life was created.... and how much i've changed. I don't think i've grown up any, but i've changed. maybe.... i'm less wild on a daily basic, but sillier on the weekends. that's a good way to put it
i've calmed myself down, and am less of an in your face protester.
i'm more of get them one on one, by being "normal" and teaching type of gal now.

i'd also tell you about how this was my first school year since 7th grade w/out a bf. and how that has seriously been a good thing. It's the first itme I'm defined by only myself and not who I'm dating.

then i'd tell you about how i'm so glad i got away from my highschool freinds and how much i can't wait to get back to them. i know that if i'd stay in omaha i'd never appeciated them or care about them so much. the distance made me miss them so much more. knowing i could only see them sometimes. WE are now planing monthly get togethers. that's awsome.

I'd then tell you about how i learned i'm so not a small town girl, i'm made for a small city w/lotz of potential b/c it fits me so well. and how much the midwest means to me.

i haven't learned all that much in class, i've made alot of stupid mistakes outside of class and those have taught me such cool things. The classes have shown me how much I value good teachers and how i can't wait to be one.

I'm joining the military. never would have figured i'd do that.

i'm not where i thought i'd be.

i guess you can never tell...
my broken wings have carried me far.
they aren't broken, just different from yours!
02 April 2006 @ 01:37 am
i titled this 3things but I don't have 3 things to say, so i will find 3things

1-today i went on a hike in the woods, it rained last night. this turned out to be the best part of the day. We pretened it was a horror movie. I can't wait to make the sequal.

2-you know a guy is special when he puts off sleep to allow you to bitch about an Ex.

3-my roommate is being stupid. I wish she'd quit overreacting and accept my other roommie's atempts to say sorry. Saying less then 10words in 12hours is just plain jr high-ish.

well there are my 3things,
29 March 2006 @ 10:19 am
there is a new boy in my life
he's my ex-bf's best freind
we talked for almost 3hours last night
I'm freakin out over nuttin.
somebody shoot me
20 March 2006 @ 04:59 pm
So my crazy freinds and I are working on a new project...
Hosting our very own prom!

I figured it's a great way to get us all together and have a great time, maybe if it goes really well We can make it a yearly event? I of course have taken over and found the perfect spot to host it and also hopefully the perfect place for dinner! dinner is iffty b/c some people rather just do a pot luck instead, so we dunno.

I really should delegate some of this out to others, but I just can't I'm so silly like that.

So ya our "Prom" is may 26th. It's a friday. I'm soo excited.

Pretty dresss..
having to find a date..
oh nooooooo
19 March 2006 @ 05:48 pm
sometimes I do wonder, Am i only accepting b/c my mother is racist? Would I get along w/all my brothers and sisters so well if we didn't have to unite as one b/c we hate becky/gary?

As we sat around the dinner table and my std (stepdad) insisted that I only eat fastfood, never study..ect I started to worry I am only a typical reaction to being raised in this enviroment.

Meanwhile my mom was racist while beliving nothing is wrong "they look so funny"(speaking of her african students) "they shouldn't be allowed to major in chemi" (speaking about muslims).. ect

Last night I sat in a room with the majority of my friends and we joked about how diversy we are, we even have Redd who is an "Irish Jap" (his words not mine).

Without JROTC I'd never had made many of those friends. I'm glad I did. I've always known my mother was wrong, but it's so nice to sit in a room full of people every shade of red,white,brown,yellow and know it's not to spite her but just b/c these are my friends. They understand me. And even when we don't understand eachother we still have fun.

I love my freinds. but sometimes while having dinner around the table I think I'll still worry that i'm only reacting to my parents.

-miss mary marz.

(p.s. I really should pick a name I wish to be called, mary, mare, marz, marzy)